Web Designers Friday Fun: 9 Phrases to Help Men Interpret Women

My inbox seems to be really busy at the moment and I almost missed this gem that landed earlier this week (thanks Paul). It gave me a chuckle in what has been a stressful few days and and I thought that it would be good for the new fun section on the blog. Its nothing to do with website design, but that’s the point of the new fun catagory.

The email had 9 phrases helping us guys interpret what women really mean with the following phrases (I’ve just cut and pasted it). What do ya think Sarah, is this about right?
1.Fine: This is the word a woman will use to end an argument when she is right and you need to shut up.
2.Five Minutes: If she’s getting dressed, “five minutes” means a half hour. “Five minutes” is only “five minutes” if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3.Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. “Nothing” actually means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with “nothing” usually end in “fine.” (See #1.)
4.Go Ahead: This is a dare… not permission. Don’t do it!
5.[Loud Sigh]: This is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you’re an idiot and wonders why she’s wasting her time standing there and arguing about nothing. (See #3 for the definition of “nothing.”)
6.That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s okay” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7.Thanks: If a woman is thanking you, do not question the gratitude, or faint. Just say “you’re welcome.”
8.Whatever: This is a woman’s way of saying f*&# you. [Editor’s Note: In JoseyLand, “whatever” can also easily replace “fine.” Often does. See #1 for more info.] 9.Don’t Worry About It–I Got It: This is another loaded statement, meaning she has told you to do something several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?” For the woman’s response refer to #3.

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